One time i went into the kitchen when I noticed my wife pouring some ice into water. I had asked her why she was putting ice cubes in water, instead of chewing them when I saw the ice, just sitting in the cup, melting. It got me kinda aroused watching those cubes swish around in that water. I was about to orgasm at the sight of those sexy cubes, I had to get outta there. I went back to bed and found myself having dreams about the ice cubes killing my wife and raping me, it was a weird dream but it had made me orgasm all over the cats and dogs in the room. So for weeks i had been fantasizing about the ice, when one day I found a site devoted to sexual acts with ice; It was called Icescrewing.com and I had been masturbating to it for weeks when finally I realized that I had ice in my freezer. I took some ice out of the tray and starting chewing on some, so innocent did not deserve to be chewed on, while I also started rubbing ice on my scrotum, my testicles about to burst, and putting some in my anus (it was really hard trying to keep the cubes in my butthole, while i was also rubbing some on my scrotum). So, I finished and a few hours later, my wife came home with new bags. of. ice. I was hard, again. I had asked my wife if we could have sex, she said sure. We were both naked when I had asked her if she could violate me with cubes of ice, she told me that that was really kinky and had agreed to. Oh, as she shoved those poor innocent cubes into aching rectum, I thought that I hate my wife and I wanna kill her, hard. So, while she was sleeping I took some ice and put it in a cup next to the bed while I hacked into her neck with an axe, the same axe I had used to kill the cats and dogs, and I sold my children to some sex trafficking buisness after i shoved ice cubes in my ass and masturbated right in front of them. I then watched as they were being raped, hard with giant dildo bats, like from Saints Row: The Third, and beat until one of my girls tried to fight back, in which case, he took a butcher's knife and started to skin her while forcing her to give him a blow job. Then my other girl was injected with some kind of paralysis serum. The man, his name was Steve btw, threw her on the bed and started to saw her body in half, meanwhile i'm just rubbing ice on my scrotum, and had mirrors on the ceiling, she had to watch herself get mutilated, she couldn't scream either because the serum took her voice away. So, anyway I took the ice to a church, where we got married and lived happily ever. So then the talent agent stands up and asks what it's called and I tell him "The Aristocrats"